Emotional Intelligence: EQ vs. EI vs. IQ

Emotional Intelligence: EI vs. EQ vs. IQ

In the early 1900s people searching for a predictor of success settled on Intelligence Quotient or IQ.  It seemed reasonable that more intelligence would: 1) open doors such as advanced education required for certain high prestige careers and 2) provide a means to figure out the secrets of success.  Throughout the century, better tests and a wider variety of tests were created to more accurately predict success.  The SAT was created to predict success in college, MSAT in management curriculum and LSAT in law school.  Some tests were designed to differentiate between IQs of 70 and 80, others between 90 and 110 and others between 135 and 145.  Each test had its special purpose, its supporters and its detractors.

But it became clear that while IQ was important, there were other factors that were perhaps even more important.  Studies in the 1980s and 1990s showed that there was less than a 25% correlation between IQ and career success.  We have all heard of taxi drivers with Ph.D.s and company presidents who cannot create coherent sentences.  Stories abound that show wasted capability such as a person who scored very high on IQ tests, worked as a bouncer in a bar, parked his Harley motorcycle in his kitchen and read Greek and Latin classics in their original language.

We now know that there are many factors that affect success.  The one I wish to focus on is emotional quotient (EQ).  Today’s literature calls it “emotional intelligence” and abbreviates it “EQ.”  For two reasons, I believe the term Emotional Quotient is more appropriate than Emotional Intelligence.  First, the discussions center around the difference between intelligence (ability to reason) and emotion so I believe combining the terms emotional and intelligence may lead to confusion.  Second, if we see emotional as an adjective and intelligence as a noun, it means a cognitive understanding of emotions, while the literature usually refers to the identifying, feeling and using emotions.

For example:  In the past, we may have bought products based on the characteristic of the product.  Today, with so many variations on products that can satisfy our need – frequently manufactured by the same company and packaged differently for different resellers – we have moved to relationship buying.  We do not buy from someone we do not trust or like.  We are much more likely to buy from someone we trust and like.  Thus a person who has a high ability to recognize, identify and feel emotions in him/herself and others (high EQ) will become a more successful salesperson.

People with high EQ will have more friends and mentors in companies and thus advance faster than a person of equal (or perhaps greater) IQ.

Likewise, people with high EQ will be better liked and more appreciated in the community or in politics and be able to solicit more backers for their proposals.

Some careers require a high IQ just to get into the career.  A study was done of 80 scientists with Ph.D. degrees and it was found that an IQ of about 120 was required to get into their program in college, but ten of fifteen more points of IQ did not predict their eventual success compared to others.  Those with a higher EQ enjoyed more success.  A conclusion from this study was that IQ set a floor or threshold for entry into the career, but that once that threshold was met, EQ determined the eventual success.

The benefit, if EQ a greater indicator of life success than IQ, is that EQ can be modified through a program of directed learning.  Regardless of your IQ or current level of success, you can increase your EQ and thus increase your life success.  You truly are the master of your destiny.

What is Emotional Intelligence?

What is Emotional Intelligence?

Several different definitions have been suggested for emotional intelligence, and a few authors have suggested different names, stating that the name “Emotional Intelligence” is not what we really mean.  The definition I use is, “Our ability to recognize, feel, control and use our emotions, and to recognize and respond to others’ emotions in a mutually beneficial relationship.”  “Control” does not mean to eliminate or suppress emotions, but to express them in healthy, socially acceptable ways.

Further, much of the literature contrasts Emotional Intelligence with Intelligence Quotient.  For that reason, I prefer the term Emotional Quotient, recognizing that intelligence and emotion are two different functions, both of which can help us or hinder us in reaching success as we define it.

There seems to be three camps on emotional intelligence: ability-based, trait-based and popularized.  Ability-based, first defined by Salovey and Mayer in 1990, uses standardized tests and compares your results with that of others who have taken the tests.  This seems to be the camp most educational institutions favor.  They define four areas of abilities:

The ability to accurately perceive emotions,

The ability or use emotions to facilitate thinking,

The ability to understand emotional meaning and

The ability to manage emotions.

The second “ability” listed seems to place emotions in a subservient position to thinking where I believe emotion and thinking must separate but equal.

The trait-based, defined by Petrides, uses self-reporting to measure an individual’s self-perception of their emotional abilities.  This method recognizes that emotion lies outside a person’s cognitive ability.

The popularized model, from Goleman in 1995, is also called the mixed model.  It recognizes four constructs:

Self-awareness,

Self-management,

Social awareness and

Relationship management.

There are many tests on the internet for self-assessment in each of these four areas.  Some of these tests report your strengths in each tested area as a percentile of all people who have taken the test.  These tests are subject to “faking it” and on the ones I have taken, the instructions are inadequate such as the time range to consider to answer a question (the past hour, month, year, decade, since a significant emotional event in my life, etc).

The better you understand your emotions and can manage them, and the better you can recognize others’ emotions and properly respond to them, the better your chances of career or life success.  Helping you achieve that understanding and ability is my goal and the definition of Emotional Intelligence.

Goal Achieving: Discovering Your Passion

Goal Achieving:  Discovering Your Passion

It is much easier to continuing working toward your goal, even in the face of obstacles, if your goal is one of your passions.  But how do you know your passions?

Method 1:  What you talk about.

For a week or two, keep track of what you talk about with your friends and what you do with your free time.  Do not include conversations of activities in which you have little or no control, such as activities at work or conversations dictated by your school.  At the end of the time, review your lists and rank activities and conversations for frequency.  Those items that have scored the highest are probably passions.

Method 2:  Your 100^th birthday speech.

Pretend you are now 100 years old.  Give a speech to your friends and neighbors about what you learned in life and what events or activities have given you the greatest pride.  Those events or activities are probably passions.

Method 3:  Your eulogy.

Pretend you have just passed away and you are listening to your best friends giving your eulogy.  What do you want them to say?  It may be something that you have not yet accomplished but want to be remembered for having done.  That what you wish to be remembered for is probably a passion.

Method 4:  Your epitaph.

Pretend you have passed away.  What do you want on your headstone as your epitaph?  This one is “get to the point with a few words.”  What you want to be remembered for with your epitaph is probably a passion.

It may be necessary to change the method used after you start, and it may be necessary to work on one method for several days or weeks.  Keep at it until you are satisfied that you are honest and complete in your answer.

Which ever method or methods you use, you now have an idea of what is important to you and have an idea of your passion or several of them.  Write a S.M.A.R.T. objective to support each passion.

If your passion is to be a good family man, your objective may be a process objective such as, “Spend 20 minutes with each child each day.”  An outcome objective may be, “Ensure son Jim reaches his objective of achieving the Eagle Scout award.”

If your passion is to own a large house on 160 acres, your objective may be, “By December, 2012, I will own a 4000 square foot or larger house on 160 acres.”  A subordinate goal may be, “By January 31, 2010, I will have a plan in place to achieve the house goal.”

Knowing what is important to you (your passion) and building your goals and objectives to support that passion will go a long way in achieving your goals.

Good luck in 2010 and beyond.

I Cannot Do It All Myself

I Cannot Do It All Myself

Monday a.m. – Make a list of things to do; put the items into three groups A (critical), B (important) and C (nice to get done); prioritize the “A’s”, and start with the A1 task. Monday evening, I know that I worked on the most important things – but I did not come close to accomplishing what was necessary. Tuesday, it will be the same thing all over again with more items on my to-do-list.

I would hire someone to share my workload except for three reasons: 1) no budget for another person on staff, 2) it takes a lot of time (which I do not have) to hire someone and 3) it takes a lot of time (which I do not have) to train someone.

It is a good thing I am a man because when I pull all of my hair out in frustration, I can attribute it to male pattern baldness.

But there is a better way. After you prioritize your tasks, start at the top and decide who should do each one. Remember to do what you do best and hire out the rest.

If you are a consultant or coach, any task that is not consulting, coaching or client contact should be delegated to outside experts. That means that you should let: 1) a real estate agent find that new office for you after you give her your requirements, 2) an accounting firm do your books and billing, 3) a web design expert design and run your web site and 4) a sales professional make your cold calls.

If you are a speaker anything that is not speaking, content creation or reputation building should be delegated to outside experts. Let someone else who knows how and has the professional equipment duplicate your CDs.

Even outside your business the principle applies equally. I used to repair my own car – to the extent of rebuilding the engine; now I take it to the dealer. We have a cleaning service clean our house monthly (kids are married). Hire a lawn care service to take care of your yard so you have the time to have fun. If you enjoy the task and have time, do it. If you do not enjoy it, hire it done.

Please remember that “delegate” does not mean you abdicate your responsibility in the areas of timeliness and quality. It is your business so be sure your outside experts are aware of your schedule and quality requirements. If they do not meet your expectations – do not micromanage them (remember, you do not have enough time) – replace them. As you move forward in your business building, you will create more and more solid business relationships with the outside experts and can focus on doing what you do best and like the most.

7 Negative Emotions, 7 Positive Emotions

7 Negative Emotions / 7 Positive Emotions

Napoleon Hill, in his book Think and Grow Rich, published in 1937, listed seven negative emotions to avoid if you want to achieve success. The emotions are:
Jealousy,
Anger,
Greed,
Fear,
Hatred,
Revenge and
Superstition.

I have studied this list, written about the emotions, discussed them in study groups and reflected at length on them. On the question of which is most important, most powerful, or the worst in terms of business success, I have heard powerful arguments for each one. The selection seems to be determined by which emotion a person has recently experienced, either internally or he or she has been the recipient of acts caused by the emotion in another person. Careful reflection will reveal that any one, alone or in conjunction with others, will be fatal to business success or personal success.

We need to eliminate all of those negative emotions, but if we just eliminate them, there will be a vacuum. We must fill that vacuum with the seven positive emotions. Again, Napoleon Hill gives us his list.
Desire
Faith
Love
Sex
Enthusiasm
Romance
Hope

He states that there are other positive emotions but they could be classified under the above list.

If we do not use the positive emotions, the vacuum will be filled by the negative emotions because we are constantly bombarded by them from news, society, entertainment, friends, family and co-workers.

As with a muscle, using emotions strengthens them. The more we feel an emotion, the stronger it becomes.

To take control of your emotions and build the positive emotions, focus on a positive emotion such as desire. What do you desire? How will you feel when you have the object? Feel good about it. Hold that desire and feeling for at least 30 seconds. Do this for the same emotion for 21 days then move to another positive emotion.

When you feel any negative emotion, stop, acknowledge it, and dismiss the emotion. Do not bury it, just let it go. For example if you get angry at other people, it causes you to feel bad, waste time and mental power thinking about that anger, develop stomach acid and make poor decisions – but all the anger you direct at other people does nothing to them. They probably do not even know you are angry at them, and if they did know, probably do not care. Your anger at other people hurts you and does not affect them at all.

Developing the positive emotions is very good for two reasons: 1) they replace the negative emotions, but more important, 2) they are the path to success.

Develop your positive emotions and have a successful 2010!

Hugh Curley

Happiness and Love – The New Math

Happiness and Love – The New Math

When we were children, we were told to share our toys because there were not enough for everyone to have all they wanted. The toys my brother was playing with were not available to me. The same thing happened when it was time for desert; if I got a larger piece of cake, he got a smaller one. We were working with a fixed amount of the asset and when dividing it, if one person got more, the other person got less.

In school, the training was reinforced. There could only be a certain percentage of “A’s” in each class. If your team won in gym class, my team lost. There could only be one valedictorian (although in my graduating class there were three).

Then we applied for a job and saw that the process was very competitive, two applicants for the one job. One person won, the other lost.

This is called a “zero-sum” process – if I get three more, you must get three fewer.

But some assets do not fit the zero-sum concept; with them, the more you give, the more you get. Two of these assets are happiness and love. The only way to get more happiness in your life is to give more happiness to others. If you want more people to smile at you, then smile at more people. If you want more people to like or love you, start by liking or loving more people.

If I have one toy and give it to you, I now have none. If I have one smile and I give it to you, you will return it making two smiles. Probably, you and I will both then give two other people smiles, and they will return them making a total of six smiles. This can go on creating many smiles – all from the one I gave away in the beginning.

Except with babies, you receive what you give. If you give no happiness or love, you will get none. If you give a little, you will get a little. If you give a lot, you will get a lot. Decide how much happiness and love you want and give that much to others.

Think and Grow Rich vs. Unstoppable, Book Review

In 1937, Napoleon Hill published his landmark book, Think and Grow Rich, based on interviews of over 500 of the most successful people of the early 20 century.  In it he listed thirteen steps to achieve riches or whatever you saw as success.

1n 1998, Cynthia Kersey published her book, Unstoppable, based on her research about people who overcame “impossible odds” and went on to achieve greatness.  In it she listed seven characteristics to achieve your goal.

Both books are full of stories of successful people organized in a manner to support the thirteen or seven points.  This writer found Think and Grow Rich to be a deep book to be studied and read many times, while Unstoppable is very emotional.

But what struck this writer was the similarity of the points.

	Think and Grow Rich	Unstoppable
1	Desire	Devote themselves to their true purpose; Follow their heart’s passion
2	Faith	Believe in themselves and their desire
3	Autosuggestion
4	Specialized Knowledge	Prepare for the Challenges
5	Imagination
6	Organized Planning/Leadership
7	Decision
8	Persistence	Persevere, no matter what the challenges
9	Power of the Master Mind	Ask for help and build a support team
10	The Mystery of Sex Transmutation
11	The Subconscious Mind
12	The Brain
13	The Sixth Sense

These two books, taken together give you a depth of understanding and the power of emotion to achieve whatever you dream.  Where the one does not move you the other will.  Get the pair and study them together.

Intellectual Faculties

For 3000 years, philosophers, scientists and theologians taught us that you become what you think about. Are we truly masters of our own destiny, or controlled by forces outside ourselves? What separates humans from lower animals that are controlled by their environment – if anything? Is the only input to our mind our five senses?

I believe that humans have six intellectual faculties that allow us to determine our destiny and to rise above our environment. Active use of these faculties is what separates humans from lower animals.

The intellectual faculties are imagination, reason, intuition, perception, memory and will. You can use them to build a powerful conscious mind, conceive beautiful new futures and even change your self-image.

With these intellectual faculties you can control what you think.

Imagination

Imagination is the intellectual faculty used to fantasize and create your dream life. It is the part of the mind that Thomas Edison referred to as the land of possibilities. Carl Benz fantasized about a horseless carriage; Edison fantasized about the movie projector and incandescent light bulb, the Wright brothers fantasized about flight. Each brought their fantasy into existence. In fact, every invention started in someone’s imagination.

Even inventions discovered by serendipity, such as vulcanizing rubber or the glue used on Post-it notes, required someone’s imagination to apply the discovery.

There are two types of imagination: adaptive and creative.

Adaptive imagination is the type we use most often. We use adaptive imagination when we put two or more existing ideas together and come up with a new idea, or when we have a problem and modify an existing idea to develop a better solution. You can develop your adaptive imagination reading, brainstorming and in-depth studying of problems you wish to solve. Adaptive imagination usually produces evolutionary advancement.

Creative imagination is the type that develops an original idea. You can develop your creative imagination by relaxing your mind and taking notes of your thoughts. Creative imagination usually produces revolutionary advancement.

Young children have very active imaginations. An empty box could be a castle, car or an airplane. Early in school, they are taught that such fantasies were for little kids and it is time to grow up. So the greatest force in the history of the world, imagination, goes dormant.

Re-activate and develop your imagination. It is people who develop their imaginations that come up with unique solutions to problems. It is the person with an active imagination that makes the great artist, inventor or author.

Imagine a better life. Ignore any logic or reasonableness. If you want greater income, imagine making your annual income your monthly income. Rather than a promotion at work, imagine being president. An active imagination will take us beyond the limits created in our self-image.

Just before going to sleep and just upon awaking, visualize yourself already having reached your goal. Feel the happiness and satisfaction. The sub-conscious does not evaluate input. It accepts anything input to it.

It does not matter that you do not know how to reach the goal; that information will come to you. It is important that you see yourself having reached that goal, and that you believe you can reach it.

Reason

Reason is the opposite of imagination. Reason is the logical part of the mind and does the thinking and planning. It is the faculty most people in the western world develop in school. This provides the ability to choose by filtering the inputs from the senses or intellectual faculties.

Examples of reasoning faculty are: your plans to achieve a goal, your well thought out decision to follow route A rather than B, and your argument to convince someone join your group.

There are two types of reason: deductive reasoning and inductive reasoning.

Deductive reasoning is a process of applying logical principles to given premises or general facts to derive a specific fact. If the logical principles are applied correctly and the starting premises are accepted as true; the mind has no ability to reject the result. The teaching of geometry and philosophy in high school and college are examples of deductive reasoning.

Your starting premises (self-image) about you are developed at an early age, before the inductive mind has developed. In a positive environment, you benefit from the positive ideas; in a negative environment the negative energy enters your thinking and you become a product of that environment. In other words, if you were told at a young age that you are a good person, as you grow older you accept evidence that supports that and reject evidence that refutes your belief. If you were told that you are a bad kid, you will accept evidence that supports that and reject evidence to the contrary. Your self-image, either good or bad will become stronger.

Inductive reasoning is a process of deriving general principles from particular facts or instances. This is the critical intellectual faculty and begins to develop in some people at the age of six. The inductive reasoning faculty questions every thought or impression entering your conscious mind and accepts what it deems is good for you and rejects what it deems as bad. If you do not use this, you become like animals; you become a servant of your environment.

You can develop this faculty by playing logic games, solving Sudoku puzzles, studying philosophy or mathematics, reading good books or having discussions with thinking individuals.

Intuition

Intuition is the faculty of knowing or sensing without the use of rational processes; it is an impression of something not evident or deducible. Intuition is that little voice you hear that tells you to do this, or don’t do that. It is that flash of light – that great idea supposedly from out of nowhere.

When you set your goal, you may not know how to reach it. The solution will come to you from the universe and probably in a manner that you could not have planned or thought of yourself. Study the problem diligently, then relax and the answer will come to you.

Always carry a note pad and pen. When a flash occurs write it down immediately or you may lose it.

Learn to trust and follow your intuition. To hear that voice, you must quiet your mind. Go to a quite place and relax, both physically and mentally. Do not think of anything and let the universe guide you. Relaxation or meditation music can help.

Some people say that prayer is you talking to God and intuition is God is talking to you.

You can develop you intuition by listening to it. Free your mind or all thoughts and turn off your inductive reasoning. Listen to the universe and write down what flashes of genius you receive. Intuition is what gives us the ideas for our creative imagination.

Carl Jung said, \”Intuition is perception via the unconscious.\”

Perception

Perception is your view of events or facts. Events and facts are neutral. Your perception of those is your point of view and determines your attitude. It is possible to shift your point of view.

Some examples: If a man brings flowers to his wife for the first time after being married for five years, he may see it as showing affection; she may see it as seeking forgiveness for something he has done wrong.

If you get laid off, you may see it as a bad thing because you lost your income, or a good thing because now you are free to move to a better job.

When you see a situation that at first appears bad, stop, clear your mind, and see it as neutral. Then change your point of view to find the good.

Memory

Memory is the faculty of retaining and recalling past experience. Oscar Wilde defined memory as the diary that we all carry with us.

Our memory tells us where we live, gives us pictures of our spouse and children and lets us know why we want to go home. It helps us remember where we work, what we do there and why.

It also reminds us of what happened the last time we tried something new and did not have success – and creates self-limiting beliefs.

If you give energy to your past failures (we all have had them) you will continue to fail; if you give energy to your past successes (we all have had them) you will continue to succeed. When you get a flash of a past failure or indiscretion, admit it and replace it with a good thought. It may be a good idea to choose that replacement thought now so that when you remember something bad, you already have the replacement

Scientific studies show we all have perfect memories. We can develop our recall ability by games such as Trivial Pursuit, memorizing songs or poems, or acting in a play.

Will

Will is the ability to give yourself a command and follow through on it; your ability to concentrate. Will encompasses will power and self-discipline

Will power is the inner strength to make a decision, take action, and handle and execute any aim or task until it is accomplished, regardless of inner and outer resistance, discomfort or difficulties.

Self-discipline is the rejection of instant gratification in favor of something better. It is the giving up of instant pleasure and satisfaction for a higher and better goal. Self-discipline is forgoing that extra piece of delicious cake for the higher goal of better health.

Summary

Imagination is the faculty used to create the mental picture of your dream life. Reason gives you the ability to plan for it. Intuition gives you that flash that shows you the way and helps you solve the problems. Perception is the faculty that allows you to see the obstacles and problems as necessary steps to reaching your dream rather than road blocks. Memory is where you keep track of your dream and plans. Will keeps you focused on this dream.

All of the intellectual faculties are neutral – they do not understand good or bad, right or wrong. So, if you imagine yourself as physically fit or wealthy, it will happen; if you imagine yourself as fat or broke, it will happen. You reap what you sow. If you plant corn seeds you get a corn crop. If you plant limited ideas you get limited results. If you plant abundance thinking, you get abundance in life.

These inner powers are not reserved for a few special people, we all have all of them. The intellectual faculties are mental muscles and, like other muscles, need to be used or they will atrophy. We can develop them and use them to give us a fuller, more abundant life.

You become what you think about. Control your thoughts to become anything you want to be. It is within your power.

How Does a Leader Lead

How does a leader lead?

The best definition of a leader, in my opinion, is a person who has a vision and can communicate that vision to organize followers to help him or her reach that vision. To be a leader, you must:

1) have someplace to go (your vision),

2) have followers, and

3) organize those followers to help you reach your vision.

I believe leaders follow a five step process. These steps are as follows.

Step 1. Have a vision or dream. You cannot lead someone if you do not know where you are going. Your destination must be clear in your mind and you must be able to define or describe it clearly in few words. You must be completely committed to the realization of this dream or the obstacles you encounter will de-rail you. It must be your dream and not someone else’s dream or something you think is a “good idea.”

Dreams can be like acorns. They must be nourished until they can grow into mighty oak trees. Please see my blog post on this subject. (hcurley.wordpress.com)

A person in a position of authority but with no vision MAY be a manager, but is not a leader. Please see my blog post on the differences between leaders and managers.

Step 2. Communicate your vision to attract like minded individuals. People will step forward to help you reach your vision only if they know about it. Therefore, communicate your dream clearly and frequently in venues where like minded people are likely to listen. Do not get into arguments, (a man convinced against his will is of the same opinion still), but put forth your vision clearly and strongly.

If people present issues you have not considered, or for which you have no answers, work on being able to answer these issues in the future. If people present issues that divert you from your vision, ask yourself if this is really your dream.

Step 3. Surround yourself with people who see your dream. You will need the following groups with each group of a size determined by the size of your dream.

To lead your self, use your head. To lead others, use your heart.

Master mind group – Your Board of Directors, mentors and other guiding individuals that you meet with at least weekly.

Other leaders – Your lieutenants who will lead others toward your dream in your absence. These lieutenants may be in charge of different aspects of reaching your vision (such as fund raising, media relations, government relations, etc), in other geographic areas or covering different shifts. Strong managers may also fill these roles.

Strong followers – These are people who will do your bidding because they believe in you or your cause, but cannot or will not train or guide others. These are the people who go door-to-door to spread your ideas, for example. Managers may also fill these roles.

Other followers – These people will perform non-leadership or non-management tasks but do not have the strong understanding of your dream. These are the people you would use to stuff envelopes, for example.

Do not be afraid to use people who are smarter, stronger or more aggressive than you; they will make you smarter, stronger and more aggressive.

Step 4. Communicate your vision to keep your followers on track. This is a never ending process. Use posters, meetings, e-mail, web-broadcasts, etc. to keep your people focused. The most important communication is through a good example.

If you notice that steps 2 and 4 are both about communication you have discovered that the most important function of leadership is communication: first to find people with similar direction to you and then to keep them focused.

Step 5. Follow the mechanics of leadership. You can learn the mechanics of leadership from Toastmastes, college courses, leadership books, books on leaders, observation, and trail and error.

A partial list of mechanics of leadership is: communication, delegation, follow-up, develop/train followers, action and persistence.

Planning is probably a leadership role, implementing the plan is probably a management role.

As you study leadership and are building your plans, at some point you must stop planning and start executing. Leaders believe “the sooner the better.” ACT NOW!

Acorn to Oak Tree

Acorn to Oak Tree

When I was in sixth grade, I found an acorn while walking home from school. I planted it in a small can and took care of it. I ensured it had just the right amount of water and sunlight. When it outgrew its small can, I transplanted it to a larger can – always taking care of it because it was so fragile. Later, I planted it outside in a carefully chosen place. Unfortunately, the rabbits ate its leaves, so I placed a fence around the small, young tree.

That was years ago, and now that oak tree has a strength that I could never hope to achieve. My grand children can play in its limbs and swing from it.

The acorn to oak tree analogy applied to ideas.

When you first conceive an idea, it is tender and fragile. You must nourish the idea and ensure it has just the right amount of care. Later, as it grows stronger, it will take on a life of its own and, in fact, will start to control you.

Be careful of what ideas you plant in your sub-conscious or in the sub-conscious of those around you.

When we were young, well-meaning individuals may have planted negative and limiting ideas in our sub-conscious. Those ideas grew in strength and now control how we think and behave. But as adults, it is our responsibility to replace those old, negative and limiting ideas with new, positive and expanding ones of our own. Our new ideas will be like the acorn and need nourishment and care for a while, but then, like the oak tree, they will take on a life of their own.

The acorn to oak tree analogy applied to MLM companies.

When you sponsor a new person in your downline, that person is fragile in that position. Their income from the position is small, their loyalty to the company is weak, their knowledge of the product and compensation plan is only beginning; they are much like the acorn. They need you to nourish them and train them. As they become established, their income increases and their understanding of the product, company and compensation structure expands, and they become a much stronger agent. Perhaps even stronger than you. When they reach that point, the amount of nourishment and care they need will be much less, and they will be nourishing and caring for their own downline.